Your Touch Still Remains

inspired by the movie “It Ends with Us”

By: Morgan Farmer

Where you once planted sweet soft kisses upon my lips, has turned bloody and busted.

Where you once caressed my cheeks with your hands has turned into bruises.

The arms that once comforted me, are now the arms I feel caged in.

The warm hand(s) I once took in mine have turned cold, leaving a stinging feeling behind on my skin.

I feel every cut and bruise you have ever left on my body.

It feels as if they had been tattooed onto my skin.

Although the bright blue, purple, and red marks have faded from my skin, the stinging feeling still remains.

My body was your canvas, and your hands were the paintbrush.

Every time you’d leave artwork on my body that you didn’t like, you’d paint over it with white paint–In hopes it would go back to the way it was before.

Though it was out of your sight for you, your touch still remained on my body behind the paint.

I remember when I was younger, I told myself that I would never be someone’s artwork like my mom was for my dad, but here I am.

As I sit back and reflect on our relationship in this hospital with our newborn daughter, all I can see is that my relationship with you, Ryle, is the same relationship my parents had.

I refuse to let my daughter watch what I did as a child, but most importantly, I refuse to keep putting myself through this cycle.

Your touch used to feel like rays of sunshine upon my skin, Ryle.

It’s such a shame that it started to sting after a while. Because truthfully, I want nothing more than to rip the feeling you left on me off.

And I’ll be damned if I ever let our daughter know that feeling.